Dancing is his medicine for life
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My eyes were glued to his movements. He was different. It was like he showed joy within the deep sadness. The next moment he was tough while being elegant. Was such contrast even possible? He wasn’t trying to do his best to dance ‘just pretty’. It was like he was every emotion the ballet piece intended to show us. I was enchanted by Beautiful decay – a ballet performance by the Oregon Ballet Theatre.
Later that evening I realised it must have been the talent of one of the dancers that fascinated me most. He wasn’t showing a glimpse of what he had to offer inside - he gave it the full 100%. Not only the pretty things, also the darker side. No shields, no shame, no holding back. He shared his wholeness in abundance.
That night I was inspired by this experience. It made me want to start a new project. I desperately wanted to write a book about talent. A book about the unique value each of us possesses to inspire readers to discover theirs. I was excited and nervous. There are millions books in this world, how could mine stand out? How could I, a Dutch woman, write a book in English? I remember thinking: ‘You know what? Why not? I’ll throw myself in the deep!’ After having seen the ballet piece and being touched by the talent explosion of the ballet dancer, I was going for it!
An important part of my project would be to interview people about their talent. Starting with…yes, the ballet dancer! His name is Michael Linsmeier (see picture - by Chelsea Perri). This interview will be the first of a relay. His enthusiastic reply to my interview request was a promising start for this precious project.
“Something that I didn’t yet recognize really loved dancing”
“I seem to project honesty. I don’t hide anything”, he tells me when we meet. We are sitting alongside the river enjoying the afternoon sun. He seems courageous and shy at the same time. Again I am fascinated by this contrast of two apparently different qualities.
I asked him about dancing. What is it about? “When I perform I actively try to project everything out. Why not? I have shameful things, I have great things about me, but all of it is who I am.”
The way he speaks makes it very clear that this is his only way. So I am curious if he experienced this from childhood onwards. He grins. Again with an intriguing mix of humility and pride, he starts his story. He started tap-dancing when he was 8 years old. He hated being in tap-dance class, especially the costume with the polkadot blouse. He kept on dancing, despite his mother who kept saying that he could quit if he really wanted to. “Secretly I must have loved it. Something that I didn’t yet recognize really loved it”. His secret drive kept him dancing.
The most freeing experience ever
When he was fourteen he left the family dairy farm to live in the big city at a dance-boarding school together with city kids, to whom he initially didn’t feel part of. Here he experienced a major culture shock. “I was trying to figure out how life worked outside the safe area that I knew. At that time I was so closed off and feeling depressed. I was struggling with finding a purpose for life”. Then he experienced his most freeing experience ever. His contemporary dance teacher asked them to improvise. He took this opportunity to let the ‘caged animal’ out. “I finally found a way to put all of these emotions I was feeling into movement. I literally jumped in the air and smashed my face on the floor. Pretending I was ripping my body apart”. Other students were terrified and asked if he was OK. For the first time in a very long period he felt great. “Wow, this is what dancing is… Everything what is happening in life, just letting it out. That’s where that emotional release really started”.
My heart jumped when I heard his story. Somehow our talent needs to be released and his explosion in the contemporary dance class was a clear example. We might not all experience this in such an explosive way as Michael, but we cannot ignore the drive to express what’s inside each of us. In ballet theatres, in schools, in offices, everywhere we can choose to step out of the ‘box’ and express our true colours.
Streamlining talent
He also talks about the years after this experience. How he learned to ‘streamline’ his talent. How he turned all his feelings into movements. How he enjoys understanding the characters in ballet performances. How he gets inside the character’s skin and uses his own emotions to project meaning while dancing. “I can do this, because we practice hard. You feel comfortable and confident on stage about the techniques to let it all go. And you can just glow. That’s where I try to get every time I perform on stage”.
Talent in 1 word
“What would be your true talent in 1 word?” I ask him. I am fond of this question, because it helps people to know the essence of their talent. He grins, waits until a few children are far enough that they cannot hear him say: “I guess it’s best described as… Fuck it!... Give it all you got! Why not just explode and let it all out?”
It’s true. This might be his talent indeed. He’s not ‘just being brave and strong’ saying this. He is authentic and sincere. It’s his way. “To be honest I really think it’s something that I don’t have really much control over’.
When I ask him about the effect his talent has on others, he sincerely replies: “I hope it brings inspiration for people not be afraid. To try things they are terrified of. I am also scared to do things. I am shy, but I just do it and give it my all”. This is exactly why I was so fascinated by this talent during the ballet piece. Standing on the grass after shooting pictures, Chelsea, my photographer friend, reminds me that he inspired me to start the talent project that night at the Ballet. Again a humble but huge smile came to his face. “Yes”, I admitted kind of shy, “It’s true that your talent, which was shown in your way of dancing that night, touched me, inspired me and made me overcome my fears which came with the idea of writing a book.” I am, again, amazed by the way talent works. What you give using your talent, is of great value for someone else.
‘Music is my medicine for dancing. Dancing is my medicine for life’
You think life will be easy after having found your talent and learned how to express it? I am sorry to disappoint you. Don’t get me wrong. Almost nothing can beat being in the ‘zone’ of expressing your talent, but it doesn’t get easier when you find a way to release the treasure inside. It’s like playing sports at the Olympic level. You have to constantly take good care of yourself and listen to your needs. One element of Michael’s talent seems to be the intensity of his emotions. During the interview I can see that those are quite overwhelming at times. The journey is to learn how to deal with what it takes to have this gift. Michael has found a way. Michael found dancing to express his talent. Otherwise he couldn’t live. “Dancing makes me keep seeing the beauty in the world. It’s a way to explore other emotions that might otherwise tear me apart…”
And if he would not be able to dance anymore, he’d find another form. But to be able to keep giving his talent he needs a way to relax and recharge himself. “Music is my medicine for dancing. Dancing is my medicine for life”. After almost each day full of ballet, he drinks a beer and practices with one of his punk bands. He is a drummer and I bet he also hits the drums for the full 100%.
A kitchen full of delicious dishes
I would like to end this blog with quoting a line from my favorite poet Rumi. It expresses Michael’s talent in every aspect. Why would you settle for a cup of lukewarm water, in this kitchen full of delicious dishes? Why would you settle for a restrained life, when you have the possibility to experience the whole? He wants it all. And he wants you to do exactly the same. I am going for it. What about you?
The next interview will be with a special person with a talent that fascinates Michael. Stay tuned.